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April 20, 2023

The Conversation

Elizabeth Day

Elizabeth Day is the author of Friendaholic: Confessions of a Friendship Addict, available now in the UK. Today Elizabeth and Amanda share a down and dirty look at friendship, what is a true friend,getting ghosted, friend break-ups, and experiences they have shared in this murky area of friendship. Is losing a friendship always a bad thing; does it make you a bad friend, or can you heal and be better off without that friend? Find out in this episode.


  • [02:56] Elizabeth analyzes friendships – superficial and genuine, and how she came to re-evaluate friendships through the eyes of covid
  • [08:58] Coming to terms with friendships that are not active and how those can be viewed healthily. Experiencing grief when friendship disappears 
  • [14:21] You may be fulfilling a role in a friendship, whether you know it or not. The friendships we establish could be a result of a dysfunctional upbringing 
  • [20:08] Surviving by making friends, being ghosted and making peace with losing a friend 
  • [30:00] Statistics and the number of sustainable friendships possible. Establishing friendship barometers and the term non-consensual friendship
  • [35:40] Some friends bring chaos continually, and at what cost to you


  • Defining the language of friendship is not done when you first get to know someone. However, it should be to maintain the friendship you both enjoy.
  • A friend may cast you in a role you neither want nor are aware of, making you an emotional hostage.
  • The language of addiction speaks to that friend who is always in crisis and takes you with them. You are enabling them.


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Elizabeth Day - Website

Book: Friendaholic: Confessions of a Friendship Addict


“True friendship empowers, enables and embraces the change and the evolution and the growth of both people.” - Elizabeth Day

“A non-consensual friendship is where you find yourself in a dynamic where you never wanted to commit to being this person’s full-blown friend.  You were just being nice.  Not trying to be rude. My book is an attempt to rectify the language of friendship.” - Elizabeth Day


The Conversation with Amanda de Cadenet is a groundbreaking series of weekly interviews featuring candid conversations with impactful thought leaders. Host, Amanda de Cadenet provides a platform for raw and honest discussions on a wide variety of topics from porn to politics.Visit amandadecadenet.com to learn more and sign up for her newsletter. Follow Amanada on Instagram @amandadecadenet.